Take a second and recall the last time you really wanted something or wanted to make something happen. If you're anything like most people, you probably tried hard to get it or set it into motion (or push it away, if it was something you didn't want).
Now imagine if someone you really trust had came along and told you that if you'd just stop trying, you'd instantly get what you wanted.
Would you have stopped trying, at that point?
Even if it was the person you trust most in the world, you probably wouldn't have. Not because you don't trust this person -- but because trying and effort have such a strong momentum. Probably the best you would have been able to do would have been to try to stop trying. And that's just more trying.
Our entire lives, we've been taught and conditioned that we need to actively make life give us what we want.
But what if we could completely let go of trying to get what we want? (And let me clarify that by this I don't mean to imply that we stop doing anything towards goals and desires... but rather that we go about life doing what needs doing and responding to things as they arise, less all the usual trying and grasping).
If you did this, would all your plans and everything you want and have been working towards in life completely and instantly (or eventually) fall apart?
The point of this blog post isn't to claim that it wouldn't. Chances are, you might find yourself very surprised to see that nothing falls apart in the least. But you also might find that everything does completely fall apart.
But if it was the latter -- wouldn't that just be a telltale sign that what you really wanted wasn't what you really needed? Because you can always trust life to give you what you need -- right?
Maybe that's why we try so hard in life. Because deep down we know life will give us what we need, and we don't want what we need. We want what we want.
But the thing about it is, no matter how hard we try, life isn't going to give us what we want unless it's also what we need. Put another way, life is only going to give us what we truly want at the deepest level, beyond what we think we want at the mind/sensory level.
When we really see this, it becomes clear that trying and effort are just wasted energy. And that we can choose to live life without them. When we do that, we see that without them, life is actually a much more enjoyable experience -- even when it doesn't go like we would have deemed best.
If something is what life has in store for you, it doesn't need you to try so hard to make it happen. You can take the steps towards it without a big hullabaloo of stress, struggle and grasping. It's just in the cards. And if it's not what life has in store for you, all the effort in the world will just be in vein.
Whichever it is, this much is true: you'll enjoy life a lot better if you can take a leap of trust. If you can just trust that life knows what it's doing, already, without any help from you. (Unless, that is, you enjoy all the trying and effort?)
As my teacher, Vinn, has told me before, "Life is simple. Just put one foot in front of the next."
Just a gal experimenting with what it means to live outside of mind.
Read more about Notes to Self, the "manual" on living beyond mind.