One day, it suddenly strikes you. You admit to yourself that you don't know what's true. What's ultimately true. What's really true about yourself, about life, about existence.
A startling realization, and one that instantly sets you on a search to uncover Truth. You simply must know.
And if you truly want to know, you will. But it can be a somewhat rude awakening if you have a specific image of what you imagine Truth will look like. Which, for most people, is probably something akin to the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow.
Often you think you want to realize Truth, when what you really want is to realize is your happy, spiritual, lights-and-fireworks version of Truth -- a "Truth" that complies completely with your conception of what it should be, what it will mean for your life and what you will be able to get out of it.
In actuality, as you embark upon Truth you find out that as far as you're concerned, Truth is a sacrifice -- because it doesn't have anything to do with you and your images, wishes and ideals.
By it's very nature, Truth isn't about you. It's about Truth. So, one of the first "true" lessons you learn about Truth is that you have to be true to It -- not the other way around.
If you want Truth to fit your image, or fit into your definition of what it should be, or if you demand that it feel a certain way -- you're not being true to Truth -- you're being true to you, to ego.
If you really want to realize Truth, you will. It's your nature, your essence -- and thus, ultimately inevitable. But the prerequisite is a willingness to sacrifice ego at Truth's alter for that to happen.
And if you want to live as Truth, more than just to have a fleeting experience of Truth, you have to be willing to keep making that sacrifice daily, moment-to-moment.
To live the Truth
is to embrace
alongside the positive.
It is to see
that, in fact,
positive and negative
and everything in between
Poem: from Notes to Self: Meditations on Being
"When you become quiet, you let yourself relax into your true nature. When this happens, you realize you cannot avoid any part of your experience. If you are looking for quietness to help you avoid some feeling, then you are not going to experience the real quietness. The nakedness of quiet disarms you so that you can't avoid any experience, any event, anything." ~Adyashanti.
Whoever said "The truth hurts" wasn't kidding. It doesn't always hurt. But it definitely can. The question is, do you run from truth when it starts to sting?
Who doesn't, right? But have you ever tried not running from a painful moment or feeling? You know -- not distracting yourself, not resisting it, not blaming someone else, not retreating into your thoughts and stories about it -- but just letting it in? Just facing it and relaxing into it? Letting yourself fully feel the hurt of it?
It's definitely not the easiest or most popular approach to a painful moment or experience. But it is the one that will put you most in touch with your self and ultimately allow you to pass through the pain, instead of shelving it.
After you do this a few times, you realize that it doesn't kill you, that you can open yourself up to even moments like these -- and that you have less baggage to carry around as a result.
Here's a related note from my book, Notes to Self: Meditations on Being:
It's The Right Thing for the Moment
What's the reality of this moment?
Just a moment of feeling what is -
without the idea that it is off
in some way... that some part of it
shouldn't be happening.
Let come what may, never doubting
that it is the right thing for
That does not mean it is the right
thing for every moment... but the
remaining moments will take care of
Just a gal experimenting with what it means to live outside of mind.
Read more about Notes to Self, the "manual" on living beyond mind.