"Why is it that I find it so hard to take time for myself? Time to be, rather than time to do. And often what is urgent elbows its way to the forefront of my day and the important gets trampled in the rush." -author unknown
When you're busy, one of the hardest things to get yourself to do is stop a minute and ask yourself if you like being so busy -- and if not -- then why you keep yourself so busy in the first place?
When life is naturally busy, that's one thing. When we purposely choose to be busy though we could be giving attention to what we most care about and yearn for, that's another.
If the latter description fits you, ask yourself now -- Why do I keep busy?
Is it that you're not satisfied with what you have now? Not satisfied with the speed at which life is giving you what you want?
Do you feel you have to step in and force life to give you what you want, when you want, by constantly staying active, trying hard, keeping the ball rolling?
Or could it be that you're distracting yourself from something you don't want to feel or face? An emotion like pain or fear?
It goes without saying that people aren't wired to want to feel negative feelings and emotions. What we can so easily overlook is that a lot of what we do in our lives, a lot of our supposed busy-ness -- is the result of things we've put there to mask an underlying emotion that we just can't or won't face.
Have you investigated to see if your busy-ness is the result of trying to avoid a difficult feeling?
You might ask, "Why does this matter? Maybe I'm running from a difficult emotion, but what of it? I'd rather run than feel it."
Fair enough, and the answer to that question really all depends on you. Are you okay with your hurried pace of life? Are you willing to risk whatever health, relationship or other consequences may result from your intense lifestyle?
If pain is what you're running from, then the eventual pain from these consequences is likely to catch up with you further down the road anyway.
Would it be so bad to just let yourself face and deal with the pain by slowing down your pace and tackling it in bite sized pieces?
That's not the most popular approach to pain, but it actually works. You do work your way through it eventually. And you're left free to live you life how you choose to, rather than how you have to just to numb out the stuff you don't want to feel.
Just a gal experimenting with what it means to live outside of mind.
Read more about Notes to Self, the "manual" on living beyond mind.